Category Archives: Current Law

If You Need a Blog on Court Fees – I’m Your Man

Some of the stupidest people I have come across are lawyers. Pompous windbags with no common sense usually photographed smiling smugly in front of shelves of law books they’ve never read. In the legal profession as a whole they are the exception, most lawyers are hard working, talented and in the job for the right reasons. For every clueless numpty there are ten skilled practitioners doing their best by their client. There is, however, only one Jonathan Sumption.

Sumption has been called “the cleverest person in Britain”. I usually treat such claims with suspicion ever since George Michael boasted he was “Britain’s best songwriter”. Now I love the poetic beauty of Club Tropicana, that ode to last minute holiday bookers who couldn’t get a beachfront hotel – “all that’s missing is the sea….but don’t worry you can suntan”- but I suspect he was probably off his head and about to drive his car into a corner shop when he made the claim. In Jonathan Sumption’s case it may well be true. Continue reading If You Need a Blog on Court Fees – I’m Your Man

Hero to Zero – We Need To Talk About Sarah

Are you one of Britain’s unsung heroes?

Do you go around pushing children into ponds, before jumping in to save them, on the off chance you might get invited to an awards ceremony where you can perv at Carol Vorderman in a low cut dress?

If you are then it’s good news. You will soon be able to rest easy, with your underpants outside your trousers, safe in the knowledge that you are protected by the grandly titled “Social Action, Responsibility and Heroism Act 2015” or “SARAH” as it’s been dubbed. Continue reading Hero to Zero – We Need To Talk About Sarah

Why Pro Bono Sucks

What’s your favourite Lynx Bodyspray ?

I’ve always been partial to “Africa” – the scent of civil war and e-mail scams and “Inca” – the smell of distilled Peruvian tears. I also rather like their new fragrance “Peace” with its CND logo and the faint smell of stale tofu and marijuana.

For years Lynx have dominated the market for deodorants with ridiculous names but a rival has now emerged. Sure for Men have launched a new range of roll-on deodorant called Quantum. That’s latin for amount. If improving the nation’s personal hygiene is your thing then “quantum” is much sexier than “amount”. Amount of Solace would have been a rubbish name for a film, not a patch on Quantum of Solace which was just a rubbish film and I very much doubt that a TV show called Amount Leap would have become a cult sci-fi classic. Continue reading Why Pro Bono Sucks

UK Working Women Take On Walmart

What a brilliant few months it has been for us supermarket haters.

A  truly golden era for  those of us  who would rather walk down the Shankill Road wearing a Celtic top than spend a Saturday  pushing  a rickety trolley around a packed  soulless megastore trying to avoid  stray toddlers.

Abandoned-trolley

In September, Tesco announced that they had overstated their half yearly profits by  just over £250 million. A substantial sum, even for a premier league footballer. That was grossly negligent (if we’re being kind) or potentially fraudulent (if we’re  not). The news prompted a investigation by the Financial Conduct Authority and wiped billions off the value of the company whose  share price went down faster than  Oprah Winfrey on a death slide. Continue reading UK Working Women Take On Walmart